This past year I have OVERLY busied myself. I struggle often with finding my worth in my work and still fight that battle, daily having to lay down my selfishness. For example, the holiday season was a running back and forth between family members, photoshoots, and my full-time job because I struggle with saying no. AND I'm the one in charge of our families calendar?!?!
Maybe we need to rethink that role and hand it over to my husband who has no problem with saying no.
Christmas day, Austin and I ended up taking a much-needed vacation with some sweet friends in Crested Butte, Colorado. I had never been to Crested Butte and I hadn’t been to Colorado since I was around the age of 10! I love nature, so all the emotions that I posses (and I possess A LOT) were on overload as we drove into this beautiful place!
I mean I was in awe! Blown away by my Creator! As we drove in and everything slowed down, I actually sat and spent long lengths of time with my Lord. Praying, reading, and simply being still for hours. Nothing making me rush to fit it in. Just simply spending as much, uninterupted time as I wanted in His word.
The God of all comfort, love, peace, and joy flooded my heart and mind that was exhausted, calloused and weary. There was a realization that I can’t do it all, nor was I meant to. There was a surrendering (and still is a day-to-day surrender) to His will and what and where He is calling me.
I got to sit and read a book, guys!!!! Like outside of my bible, I rarely read. Mainly because I busy myself to the point that doing another thing stresses me out. But I picked up a book. I picked up the book “Cultivate” by Lara Casey and wow, it was like the Lord was speaking directly to all my selfishness and tenderly saying,
“I’m enough. Not all the things you try to do. I fill you up, give you nourishment, and understanding.”
I highly recommend the read so far! I’ll let you all know my final thoughts once I finish.
Alongside that growth, I learned how to ski! It. Was. Awesome. I told Austin that we need to move our log cabin back in Texas to the mountains! I mean Austin is a highly skilled skier and you know, I and my beginner self could totally make it work! ;) I’ve at least talked him into going back in the future! PRAISE! We also got to go with some dear friends, the Etters and the Nunes! And of course, when you NEVER see snow you insist on doing family photoshoots to capture these beautiful families in this beautiful place!
Friends, if you can read and remember one thing from this post, I want it to be this. Be okay with and make space for being at rest with our God. Stop. Be okay with the silence, enjoy knowing him and his word deeply, and sit and be with the Lord. I know it can be hard! I don’t like sitting and thinking over my mess. I don’t like at times what the Lord has to deal with within my heart. But let Him. Listen to Him. Delve into His word. Delight in your Savior. If your searching for understanding, peace, worth, love, you can and will find it in Jesus.
Grace and peace,